O Great Cthulhu!

"The actual sound - as nearly as human organs could imitate it or human letters record it - may be taken as something like Khlul'-hloo, with the first syllable pronounced gutturally and very thickly."

"The best approximation one can make is to grunt, bark, or cough the imperfectly formed syllables Cluh-Luh with the tip of the tongue firmly affixed to the roof of the mouth. That is, if one is a human being. Directions for other entities are naturally different."

Oh H.P. Lovecraft. We were clearly meant to be together.

Story of Our Lives

"I was in my room and I was just like staring at the wall thinking about everything, but then again I was thinking about nothing. And then my mom came in, and I didn't even know she was there. She called my name and I didn't hear her and then she started screaming “Mike, Mike!” And I go “what? What's the matter?” She goes “what's the matter with you?” I go “there's nothing wrong, mom.” Shes all “don't tell me that! You're on drugs!” I go “no mom, I'm not on drugs. I'm ok, I'm just thinking, you know? Why don't you get me a Pepsi?” She goes “No! You're on drugs!” I go “mom, I'm ok. I'm just thinking.” She goes “No! You're not thinking, you're on drugs! Normal people don't act in that way!” I go “mom, just get me a Pepsi! Please, all I want is a Pepsi!” And she wouldn't give it to me! All I wanted was a Pepsi, just one Pepsi, and she wouldn't give it to me! Just a Pepsi!"

Anything You Can Do, I Can Do Better

It Happens to the Best of Us

What DO You Do?

The Penises of Northpark

Oh, mall of suburbia and your phallic foliage.

They look more like penises if you see them in person.

I think this is the cactus we refer to when we cactus things.

They really oughtn't put these things in malls where children can grab them. Really.

This Song Changed My Life A Year Ago

From Crass' 1981 album Penis Envy.

I don't know anything about Eve Libertine and Joy de Vivre except that they must have been badasses.

Some Serious Truth

Love the Glück.

"when a living thing is hurt like that,

in its deepest workings,

all function is altered.

That's why I'm not to be trusted.

Because a wound to the heart

is also a wound to the mind."

Click Me

It's weird when you write a poem and it doesn't really work and then you find another poem that said exactly what you were trying to say and they did it first. Sucks. I am referring to "The Revenger", by the way.

Soul Sister

An honorary Tamponette

The B World? You Betcha!

Hit list or a check list?

I am so many of these.

God bless these girls.

From here.

This Man Makes Cute Movies

Love Him.

Hayao Miyazaki [January 5, 1941-Present]

Poetry Fight Club?

Hughes, Auden, Eliot

are nothing up against my soul sister, sylvia

Cyclops Kitty

Found this while looking for kittens.

It has one eye, no nose, and was alive for two days.

Kipling West made this for it. I love it.

To Get The Last Post Out Of Your Brain

Look at this kitten!

It loves you.

Whatever You Like, We Got It

I Hope This Is What Japan Is Really Like

I'm confused about their opening. Don't give it up? Abstinence?

We all know what Cat's going to say:

My Sailor Moon backpack is affecting my brain.

You Know How We Feel About These Things

We Love You So Very Much

Trololo man = Eduard Khil.

He wants us to sing together.

All over the world.

I love him even more.

Hindenburg for Your Viewing Pleasure

Too much?

Demon In The Dark

Scent is such a personal thing, we like to keep it consistent. We rarely change our perfume and soap habits. And then I found this.

Demon In The Dark by Lush.

Peppermint + Spearmint + Cloves + Apple

It's surprisingly good. Strange and vaguely masculine. Not the usual citrus and floral scents for women. It suits us.

We love it.

Click Me

I Am Hypnotized By The Hair

I hope it was billed separately.

Happy Post-Easter Guilty Activity Resuming, Christians!

It's Been a Rough Day

for both of us, Batman.

The Three Tamponettes

And Nicole Kidman

Making Young Girls Feel Like Freaks

Chubby is a noun?

I feel bad just reading this.

Good for a Shag?

An essential for every Tamponette -- "As you stroke, it strokes."

That Zombie Drinks Box Wine.

Your mother always tried to teach you to be classy.

You should have listened.

Why Choose?

Here at Tampon Heroes, we don't really like to have to make those tough decisions in life.

These people clearly get us.

Meet The Tamponettes

The Fabulous Tampon Heroes.

In Sailor Scout garb.

Protecting justice, tampon availability, and correct grammar and punctuation.

Tamponettes: I tried to make it look like you guys, heights represented and all. The outfits are the same as the Sailor Scouts' (Mars, Mercury, and Jupiter). I changed the hair and faces to make them longer. I failed on mine. Oh well.

I also did this in less than an hour.

I refuse to spend hours on my Lovesac drawing all my friends as anime characters.

No. Just no.

Personal Philosophy

The chorus pretty sums up my feelings on love.

I don't know what it is and I don't want to be hurt anymore.

Yeah. That's pretty much it.

And what is the videoblog thing Tampon Heroes has become?

Ah well. We here at Tampon Heroes call 'em like we see 'em.

Whatever that means.

Now You Too Can Pee Standing Up

I feel like often when someone is trying to convince me to do something weird they tell me that European women are doing it.

My mom ordered these.

Click Me

To learn what it means to be a man.

Che Guevara is Sexy

Ernesto "Che" Guevara [June 14, 1928-October 9, 1967]

That's what we do here at Tampon Heroes: sexualize things you'd never have thought to sexualize before. Say what you will about him as a heartless murderer who valued principle over humanity or that asshole on those kids' t-shirts, he did cut a striking figure.

Or

If that doesn't do anything for you, check out Gael Garcia Bernal as his Doppelganger in "The Motorcycles Diaries", a fairly well-written but cinematographically gorgeous and well-acted flick about Guevara's early life.

....Did I mention that Gael Garcia Bernal is in it?

[I'm not totally sure what movie this still is from (it's not "Motorcycle Diaries") but just look at those eyes]

My Baby is Black!

My apologies for another video. We've become quite the video blog. But it's short, sweet, and utterly fantastic. Enjoy your post-Hump Day (Miscegenation Thursday?):